Geek Squad for Nurses

Original Recipe, fat free, and un-diluteed.... a listing of comments, gestures and rude multimedia bits as they relate to life here in hell. What do you have to say? Post a question smart guy- I've got an answer for ya ? Leave a funny bit...This is your place to Vent! Even if it's current events, I am more than willing to share my opinions..you and your malformed puny ideas..I unclog my nose in your general direction!

Friday, May 26, 2006

The true difference between men and women

FRIENDSHIP BETWEEN WOMEN:
A woman didn't come home one night.  The next day she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house.  The man called his wife's 10 best friends.  None of them knew about it.
 
FRIENDSHIP BETWEEN MEN:
A man didn't come home one night.  The next day he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house.  The woman called her husband's 10 best friends.  Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over and two claimed that he was still there.
 


Sneak preview the all-new Yahoo.com. It's not radically different. Just radically better.

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

A FLIP FLOPPER AND MY RESPONSE TO HIS NONSENSE

HEY NORM,
GOT YOUR MESSAGE. ONE PERSON WHO FLIP FLOPS WHILE IN THE PUBLIC EYE ONLY TELLS ME THAT HE ONLY PLACES HIS BETS AFTER THE RACE IS OVER.
 
HERE WOULD BE MY RESPONSE TO HIM:
 
LET ME GUESS, ASSUMING THERE IS NO CHANGE IN THE COURSE OF EVENT LEADING UP TO 9/11, AND AL GORE WAS PRESIDENT, WE'D BE PAYING $0.99/GAL FOR PREMIMUM, PARTYING NON STOP ON BOURBON STREET, PRIVATE BUSINESS DEALS (LIKE THE PORT MATERIALS HANDLING FACILITIES) WOULD HAVE GONE ON UNCHECKED AND IMMIGRATION WOULD BE AN ISSUE HANDLED BY INCREASING TAXES TO FEED, SHELTER, EDUCATE (EN ESPANOLE, BY THE WAY) AND PROVIDE HEALTHCARE TO OUR EVER INCREASING ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT POPULATION. yOUR RIGHT (NOT) IF YOU THINK THAT PREZIDENT GORE WOULD ENDORSE OPEN BORDERS IN LIGHT OF 9/11 AND CONSIDERED OUR SOCIAL INFRASTRUCTURE ABLE TO SUPPORT A MUCH GREATER BURDEN...BEING A DEMOCRAT, THE SOLUTION WOULD ONLY TO PUT THE BURDEN ON THE  LEGAL WORKING POPULATION BY INCREASING TAXES.  OH WAIT A MINUTE..PRESIDENT BUSH LOWERED THEM...THAT MUST HAVE BEEN A MISTAKE...
 
SO I GUESS THERE NEVER WOULD HAVE BEEN ANY SORT OF RETALIATION FOR 9/11, SAY IN AFGHANISTAN OR IRAQ, THUS NEVER ANY WAR ON FOREIGH SOIL. AND I WOULD FURTHER SUPPOSE THAT THE CRUX OF BUSHES POLICY, WHICH IS TO TAKE THE "FIGHT OFF SHORE" WOULD MEAN THAT THE TERROR ATTACKS IN LONDON, KABUL BAGDAD, SYDNEY, SAUDI, OR IN INDONESIA, NEVER PREVENTED A TERROR ATTACK ON OUR SOIL. TAKING THIS A BIT FURTHER, WE SEE THAT PRESENTING A STRONG ASS KICKING RESPONSE TO 9/11 WAS THE WRONG APPROCACH AND THAT WE SHOULD HAVE JUST PASSED LEGISLATION THAT ALL AMERICANS (LEGAL ONES ANYWAYS) SHOULD CONVERT TO ISLAM, GIVE UP OUR WAY OF LIFE AND BOW DOWN TO SOME CAVE RAT BECAUSE DADDY SLAPPED HIM AROUND AS A KID AND HE'S PISSED AND WANT TO TAKE IT OUT ON SOMEONE.
 
 I WILL AGREE WITH YOU THAT PRESIDENT BUSH IS NO SAINT, BUT HE'S NOT OVER IN THE SINNERS SECTION EITHER. I STILL BELIEVE IN HIS FOREIGN POLICY. YES IT SUCKS TO LOSE LIVES IN A BATTLE THAT SEEMS TO HAVE NO IMMEDIATE WINNER. BUT THEN, THAT WAS NEVER THE POINT. GW COULD HAVE HANDLED HIS DOMESTIC POLICY BETTER, BUT HIND SIGHT IS ALWAYS 20/20. THINK ABOUT THIS; WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DEICDED AT THE TIME HE WAS MAKING THESE DECISIONS?
 
ONCE AGAIN NORM, I TRULY ENJOY BATTING THE BALL AROUND WITH YOU. WELL ENOUGH OF THE MORNING RANT , AND REMEMBER, TO FACE MECCA, YOU WOULD NEED TO BE LOOKING TOWARDS NIKKI'S ROOM ( A SUCCESSFUL LEGAL IMMIGRANT)
 
ERIC
-----Original Message-----
From: norman sims [mailto:rnarts@comcast.net]
Sent: Thursday, May 18, 2006 5:49 PM
To: Hahn, Eric C.
Subject: McIntyre in the Morning 790 KABC-FM


McIntyre in the Morning
As Heard on RADIO
Doug's Apology (NEW)
Doug admits it's hard to say you're wrong
Doug interview's Emilio (NEW)
Doug interview's Emilio an illegal immigrant from Mexico City working in Los Angeles
Mayor Villarigosa
Mayor Villarigosa Speaks at LA's biggest immigration rally
Fred Barnes
Author of The Rebel In Chief and Exceutive Editor of the "Weekly Standard"
John Snow
U.S. Secretary Of The Treasury

Ray Nagin Mixes
New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin SORRY Mix and The Chocolate City Mix
Ed Koch
Former New York Mayor

Lou Dobbs
MS 13 Gang members to be hired to kill border patrol agents
The ACLU Signers
A.J. Duffy
President Of United Teachers Los Angeles

Ambassador Joseph Wilson
Colin Powell
Former Secretary Of State
Louis Freeh
Former FBI Director 1993 - 2001
Former U.S. Senator George Mitchell
IRA Peace Talks
45 Illegal Immigrants to a room
Doug tries to get to the bottom of it.
Colin Powell
Visit the McIntyre in the Morning Audio Archives
MOUTH OFF!
Immigration Speech
Do you think the President's speech on immigration reform was:
a genuine attempt to solve the problem
done to placate you

View Past Results


McIntyre in the Morning
Doug's apology

AN APOLOGY FROM A BUSH VOTER

By Doug McIntyre

Host, McIntyre in the Morning

Talk Radio 790 KABC

There’s nothing harder in public life than admitting you’re wrong. By the way, admitting you’re wrong can be even tougher in private life. If you don’t believe me, just ask Bill Clinton or Charlie Sheen. But when you go out on the limb in public, it’s out there where everyone can see it, or in my case, hear it.

So, I’m saying today, I was wrong to have voted for George W. Bush. In historic terms, I believe George W. Bush is the worst two-term President in the history of the country. Worse than Grant. I also believe a case can be made that he’s the worst President, period.

In 2000, I was a McCain guy. I wasn’t sure about the Texas Governor. He had name recognition and a lot of money behind him, but other than that? What? Still, I was sick of all the Clinton shenanigans and the thought of President Gore was… unthinkable. So, GWB became my guy.

For the first few months he was just flubbing along like most new Presidents, no great shakes, but no disasters either. He cut taxes and I like tax cuts.

Then September 11th happened. September 11th changed everything for me, like it did for so many of you. After September 11th, all the intramural idiocy of American politics stopped being funny. We had been attacked by a vicious and determined enemy and it was time for all of us to row in the same direction.

And we did for the blink of an eye. I believed the President when he said we were going to hunt down Bin Laden and all those responsible for the 9-11 murders. I believed President Bush when he said we would go after the terrorists and the nations that harbored them.

I supported the President when he sent our troops into Afghanistan, after all, that’s where the Taliban was, that’s where al-Qaida trained the killers, that’s where Bin Laden was.

And I cheered when we quickly toppled the Taliban government, but winced when we let Bin Laden escape from Tora-Bora.

Then, the talk turned to Iraq and I winced again.

I thought the connection to 9-11 was sketchy at best. But Colin Powell impressed me at the UN, and Tony Blair was in, and after all, he was a Clinton guy, not a Bush guy, so I thought the case had to be strong. I was worried though, because I had read the Wolfowitz paper, “The Project for the New American Century.” It’s been around since ‘92, and it raised alarm bells because it was based on a theory, “Democratizing the Middle East” and I prefer pragmatism over theory. I was worried because Iraq was being justified on a radical new basis, “pre-emptive war.” Any time we do something without historical precedent I get nervous.

But the President shifted the argument to WMDs and the urgent threat of Iraq getting atomic weapons. The debate turned to Saddam passing nukes on to terror groups. After 9-11, the risk was too great. As the President said, “The next smoking gun might be a mushroom cloud.” At least that’s what I thought at the time.

I grew up in New York and watched them build the World Trade Center. I worked with a guy, Frank O’Brien, who put the elevators in both towers. I lost a very close friend on September 11th. 103 floor, tower one, Cantor Fitzgerald. Tim Coughlin was his name. If we had to take out Iraq to make sure something like that, or worse, never happened again, so be it. I knew the consequences. We have a soldier in our house. None of this was theoretical in my house.

But in the months and years since shock and awe I have been shocked repeatedly by a consistent litany of excuses, alibis, double-talk, inaccuracies, bogus predictions, and flat out lies. I have watched as the President and his administration changed the goals, redefined the reasons for going into Iraq, and fumbled the good will of the world and the focus necessary to catch the real killers of September 11th.

I have watched the President say the commanders on the ground will make the battlefield decisions, and the war won’t be run from Washington. Yet, politics has consistently determined what the troops can and can’t do on the ground and any commander who did not go along with the administration was sacked, and in some cases, maligned.

I watched and tried to justify the looting in Iraq after the fall of Saddam. I watched and tried to justify the dismantling of the entire Iraqi army. I tired to explain the complexities of building a functional new Iraqi army. I urged patience when no WMDs were found. Then the Vice President told us we were in the “waning days of the insurgency.” And I started wincing again. The President says we have to stay the course but what if it’s the wrong course?

It was the wrong course. All of it was wrong. We are not on the road to victory. We’re about to slink home with our tail between our legs, leaving civil war in Iraq and a nuclear armed Iran in our wake. Bali was bombed. Madrid was bombed. London was bombed. And Bin Laden is still making  tapes. It’s unspeakable. The liberal media didn’t create this reality, bad policy did.  

Most historians believe it takes 30-50 years before we get a reasonably accurate take on a President’s place in history. So, maybe 50 years from now Iraq will be a peaceful member of the brotherhood of nations and George W. Bush will be celebrated as a visionary genius.

But we don’t live fifty years in the future. We live now. We have to make public policy decisions now. We have to live with the consequences of the votes we cast and the leaders we chose now.

After five years of carefully watching George W. Bush I’ve reached the conclusion he’s either grossly incompetent, or a hand puppet for a gaggle of detached theorists with their own private view of how the world works. Or both.   

Presidential failures. James Buchanan, Franklin Pierce, Jimmy Carter, Warren Harding-— the competition is fierce for the worst of the worst. Still, the damage this President has done is enormous. It will take decades to undo, and that’s assuming we do everything right from now on. His mistakes have global implications, while the other failed Presidents mostly authored domestic embarrassments.

And speaking of domestic embarrassments, let’s talk for a minute about President Bush’s domestic record. Yes, he cut taxes. But tax cuts combined with reckless spending and borrowing is  criminal mismanagement of the public’s money. We’re drunk at the mall with our great grandchildren’s credit cards. Whatever happened to the party of fiscal responsibility?

Bush created a giant new entitlement, the prescription drug plan. He lied to his own party to get it passed. He lied to the country about its true cost. It was written by and for the pharmaceutical industry. It helps nobody except the multinationals that lobbied for it. So much for smaller government. In fact, virtually every tentacle of government has grown exponentially under Bush. Unless, of course, it was an agency to look after the public interest, or environmental protection, and/or worker’s rights.

I’ve talked so often about the border issue, I won’t bore you with a rehash. It’s enough to say this President has been a catastrophe for the wages of working people; he’s debased the work ethic itself. “Jobs Americans won’t do!” He doesn’t believe in the sovereign borders of the country he’s sworn to protect and defend. And his devotion to cheap labor for his corporate benefactors, along with his worship of multinational trade deals, makes an utter mockery of homeland security in a post 9-11 world. The President’s January 7th, 2004 speech on immigration, his first trial balloon on his guest worker scheme, was a deal breaker for me. I couldn’t and didn’t vote for him in 2004. And I’m glad I didn’t.   

Katrina, Harriet Myers, The Dubai Port Deal, skyrocketing gas prices, shrinking wages for working people, staggering debt, astronomical foreign debt, outsourcing, open borders, contempt for the opinion of the American people, the war on science, media manipulation, faith based initives, a cavalier attitude toward fundamental freedoms-- this President has run the most arrogant and out-of-touch administration in my lifetime, perhaps, in any American’s lifetime.

You can make a case that Abraham Lincoln did what he had to do, the public be damned. If you roll the dice on your gut and you’re right, history remembers you well. But, when your gut led you from one business failure to another, when your gut told you to trade Sammy Sosa to the White Sox, and you use the same gut to send our sons and daughters to fight and die in a distraction from the real war on terror, then history will and should be unapologetic in its condemnation.

 

None of this, by the way, should be interpreted as an endorsement of the opposition party. The Democrats are equally bankrupt. This is the second crime of our age. Again, historically speaking, its times like these when America needs a vibrant opposition to check the power of a run-amuck majority party. It requires it. It doesn’t work without one. Like the high and low tides keep the oceans alive, a healthy, positive opposition offers a path back to the center where all healthy societies live.

Tragically, the Democrats have allowed crackpots, leftists and demagogic cowards to snipe from the sidelines while taking no responsibility for anything. In fairness, I don’t believe a Democrat president would have gone into Iraq. Unfortunately, I don’t know if President Gore would have gone into Afghanistan. And that’s one of the many problems with the Democrats. 

The two party system has always been clumsy and imperfect, but it has only collapsed once, in the 1850s, and the result was civil war.

I believe, as I have said countless times, the two party system is on the brink of a second collapse. It’s currently running on spin, anger, revenge, and pots and pots and pots of money.

We’re being governed by paper-mache patriots; brightly painted red, white and blue, but hollow to the core. Both parties have mastered the cynical arts of media manipulation and fund raising. They’ve learned the lessons of Watergate and burn the tapes. They have learned to divide the nation for their own gain. They have demonstrated the willingness to exploit any tragedy for personal advantage. The contempt they have for the American people is without parallel.

This is painful to say, and I’m sure for many of you, painful to read. But it’s impossible to heal the country until we’re willing to acknowledge the truth no matter how painful. We have to wean ourselves off sugar coated partisan lies.

With a belated tip of the cap to Ralph Nader, the system is broken, so broken, it’s almost inevitable it pukes up the Al Gores and George W. Bushes. Where are the Trumans and the Eisenhowers? Where are the men and women of vision and accomplishment?  Why do we have to settle for recycled hacks and malleable ciphers? Greatness is always rare, but is basic competence and simple honesty too much to ask?      

It may be decades before we have the full picture of how paranoid and contemptuous this administration has been. And I am open to the possibility that I’m all wet about everything I’ve just said. But I’m putting it out there, because I have to call it as I see it, and this is how I see it today. I don’t say any of this lightly. I’ve thought about this for months and months. But eventually, the weight of evidence takes on a gravitational force of its own.

I believe that George W. Bush has taken us down a terrible road. I don’t believe the Democrats are offering an alternative. That means we’re on our own to save this magnificent country. The United States of America is a gift to the world, but it has been badly abused and it’s rightful owners, We the People, had better step up to the plate and reclaim it before the damage becomes irreparable.

So, accept my apology for allowing partisanship to blind me to an obvious truth; our President is incapable of the tasks he is charged with. I almost feel sorry for him. He is clearly in over his head. Yet, he doesn’t generate the sympathy Warren Harding earned. Harding, a spectacular mediocrity, had the self-knowledge to tell any and all he shouldn’t be President. George W. Bush continues to act the part, but at this point whose buying the act?            

Does this make me a waffler? A flip-flopper? Maybe, although I prefer to call it realism. And, for those of you who never supported Bush, its also fair to accuse me of kicking Bush while he’s down. After all, you were kicking him while he was up.

You were right, I was wrong.

             

                             

TalkRadio 790 KABC
HOT TOPIC


QUOTE OF THE WEEK


"I think what we need is a comprehensive border fence."

- Doug joking on the constant use of the term "comprehensive" in the immigration debate

Red Eye Radio with Doug McIntyre

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

We're Off To See The Wizard
 

    Four U.S. Presidents are caught in a tornado, and they are whirled off to OZ.

 

    They finally make it to the
   Emerald City and came before the Great Wizard.



   "What brings you before the great wizard of Oz?"

   Jimmy Carter stepped forward timidly:
   "I've come for some courage."

   "No problem!" says the Wizard. "Who is next?" 
 
 



   Ronald Reagan steps forward,
   "Well........., I.......I think I need a heart." 
 


 "Done," says the Wizard.
   "Who comes next before the great and powerful Oz?"



   Up stepped George Bush sadly and said,
   "I'm told by the American people that I need a brain."
   "No problem!" says the Wizard.  
   "Consider it done."
 


   There is a great silence in the hall.
   Bill Clinton is just standing there,
   looking around, but doesn't say a word.

   Irritated, the Wizard finally asks,
   "What do you want?"


Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. PC-to-Phone calls for ridiculously low rates.

random funnies from Waterworld, the sequal


Thanks Kate!

We all wish you the best of everything.

You will be missed.

a marine rides a train in france

The train was quite crowded, so a U. S. Marine walked the entire length looking for a seat, but the only seat left was taken by a well dressed, middle-aged, French woman's poodle.

The war-weary Marine asked, "Ma'am, may I have that seat?"

The French woman just sniffed and said to no one in particular, "Americans are so rude.  My little Fifi is using that seat."

The Marine walked the entire train again, but the only seat left was under that dog.

"Please, ma'am. May I sit down?  I'm very tired."

She snorted, "Not only are you Americans rude, you are also arrogant!"

This time the Marine didn't say a word; he just picked up the little dog, tossed it out the train window, and sat down.

The woman shrieked, "Someone must defend my honor!  Put this American in his place!"

An English gentleman sitting nearby spoke up, "Sir, you Americans seem to have a penchant for doing the wrong thing.  You hold the fork in the wrong hand.  You drive your autos on the wrong side of the road.  And now, sir, you seem to have thrown the wrong bitch out the window."
 

posting for today

:  {> 

Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight
to her grandparent's house to visit
her 95 year-old grandmother and comfort her.

When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a
heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning."

Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having sex
would surely be asking for trouble.

Oh no, my dear," replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we
figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring.

It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply
in on the Ding and out on the Dong."

She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued, "he'd still be alive if the ice cream
truck hadn't come along,"

FW: another medical breakthru



Men take heed! Another medical breakthough to prolong your life!